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KRISTELLE(Peishan)

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11 FEB

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11 FEB 2009

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17 YRS OLD


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Friday, January 15, 2010, 2:36:00 AM
Papa & I...

I am like damn damn damn pissed off with Dad...
On Sunday night, I asked Dad if the same group of friend of his would go Genting with us on the next Genting trip and he said yes. Then I told him that I'll not join them the same time due to them smoking in front of us. He said they did not enjoy the time with us too.

So why is he making a big fuss out of it?!

Dad always say we do not want to communicate with him but when we do, does it work?
I was just saying my mind. I respect him, that is why I tell him now and not when everything has been arranged for us. Is what I am doing not right?

Now Dad is picking on everything I do due to that dumb thing I did to tell him in advance due to respect.

Talking about COMMUNICATION, for GOD DAMN SICK, he SUCK at that!
I mean, what is communication when you talk behind my back and expect me to know?!
I bet that is the reason why Sis decide to write him a letter the last time...

Last night Xinrong told me a little bit about wad Dad said.
This morning Mummy did a follow up.
I ended up crying badly while talking to Mum.

From what I know, Dad said something like:

1.我的朋友抽的烟是他们自己买的我们没有权利叫他们不要抽啊!
Yes, No one can stop them, the have their freedom to smoke but they are not trying to be considerate here. Dad quit smoking because he claims that he do not want us to take in second hand smoke. but isn't he doing a double or a triple to us now? So is your friend more important than your children's health and welfare?

2.做工做到那么晚才回来,到底在做什么工?!(还叫妈咪查我的银行簿子)
HEY!who was the one who asked me to look for a job? When I was studying for my 'O' Levels before I got this job. He was the one who claims that I'm not studying and want me to get a job isn't it? Now I've got a job he is complaining that I work too late? He ask mum to check if I save money from work and if i do not, he'll get me to stop working. This is STUPID! He likes to contradict himself a lot and I HATE THIS! I finally have some friends other than my school friends he is asking me to leave? Working is now like a challenge to me and I enjoy it. I know that the outlet I am working in is not in an extremely good shape, or in fact, quite a bad one but this is the challenge for me(not saying that I am damn good) but just trying my best as a staff to bring it up. Sometimes when you work you will have to socialise, go out drink tea after work isn't it? Plus I'm working in SUNTEC now, not just Sembawang which is just a walking distance! Although I might not save alot but I have not taken money from Mummy whenever I work(not including the two months before 'O' Levels because I have exhaust my savings on the right food for my brains to work better for my exams after one month.) I am eating and spending mostly on my own money not just on my wants but my needs too. So you have no rights to not let me work.

3.这么小就学人家交男朋友
This is like ridiculous! I am a human! I have feelings too! I mean can't I just fall in love with someone I like? I am not a robot where you can set a timer and preset me to fall in love at what age okay?! Anyway, didn't you and mummy fall in love in your teens too...So why make a big fuss out of this?! Is this like a trend? When your kids are too young, parents restrict them to have a relationship. When they get older then force them to get into a relationship? (By the way, this is what is happening to me and Benny now. I'm the too young and he is the older one.) Seriously, some of the things that we are doing is probably what you think was okay when you were at our age. So stop complaining! Anyways, I think, believe and knows that Benny IS a GOOD influence to me. Without him, I doubt I could pass my O Levels this time round. He was the one who has been supporting me, supervising my progress. With him, I feel much confident about the things I do, things I pursue.

4.我再看到你骑摩托我就会打(我/在我的人、妈咪忘记了)
Okay, things are getting out of hand! If he is going to hit Benny, I would probably help him block Dad because Benny is not his child and he has no rights to hit a person like that. If he is going to hit me, I will be ANGRY, UPSET and DISAPPOINTED with him. I remember Dad had a talk with me when I was 10. It was about growing up. He said that he did his duty as a father to teach us the right way of life, good manners, and etc...He promised that he will never have to beat us again. If we do anything bad, it will be society and reality to teach us. Not him. We shall bear all consequence if anything happens to us when we do what may be not right. So since i decided that I have a boyfriend who work with me and he rides a motorcycle riding a motorcycle would definitely be considered. Unless he expect me to walk home or take a cab home after work at 11pm from Suntec. When you have a better transportation than Public Transit, would you still take it? There are many who have accidents on motorcycle but there are many who die while crossing the road too! Benny IS a safe driver. Once bitten twice shy, he had an accident when he was in his teens he finally go rid of his phobia and started riding again at a more mature age and is more cautious now. He got me a personal helmet, let me wear the better safety jacket, make sure i do not wear slippers when travelling out of Yishun. He is trying to protect me as much as possible. All these are what Dad do not know. He claims that I promised him I would not ride again BUT HE DID NOT EVEN TALK TO ME ABOUT IT! He just simply tell Mummy to tell me叫佩珊不要常常坐摩托 and that day both Benny and me took a MRT to grandparents house due to what he said. I DID NOT promise anything. I will bear the consequence if anything happens to me. I know you are a human, you would probably feel bad if anything would happen but I will bear the pain if it has to come. If I'll have an accident, even if it do not happen on the road, there are millions of thing that can happen. Flower pots can drop from above and etc...(do not want to go in details). IF he is going to hit me like I said above. I might want to leave home too.

Whatever he is talking about, I feel utterly stupid. Firstly because he is picking on whatever I am doing now just because I initiated on not going on the next Genting trip which is not just what I decided alone! It is among his all four daughters. So why am I the one who gets this trash?! Secondly, look at all four daughter of his. I am probably not the best but have I not been the one who stick with you the longest. When I am home and I have nothing on, when you get me to go out I will try to go, when you have things to arrange I would do it for you with no complains? Even until now I am trying my best to do my part. I have been respecting you. Trying to satisfy you. Always the one who try to think of you from all the other daughters. Who do you think would suggest to give you birthday presents on your birthdays? Sis has always made plans to celebrate Mummy's Birthday. I was the one who has suggested and decides on the gift. You have always been a good role model to me as a responsible person who can multi-task at work. I feel miserable when I have done so much to make you happy, so much to give in to you and still get this in return. Has what I am doing a waste of time? I wonder...

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Thursday, June 11, 2009, 12:29:00 AM
QQ空间

为了读者需求所以写了这个日志

我现在决定继续用QQ空间(similar to msn's my space)

因为……有些事情不是很想公布在这里…

因为有专门写心情的所以蛮方便的

但是 这里不会因此而冷清

我是在等姐姐发给我Ting Wei生日的照片啦

所以拭目以待哦~

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Tuesday, May 26, 2009, 3:13:00 AM
忙忙忙

最近感觉有很多事情发生
有好的有坏的,有外在因素也有内在因素
尤其是内在因素,很恐怖

开始,黄海得离开(外在和内在因素,已经没事了)
后来,读写障碍(内在因素多一些)觉得自己无能
现在,没钱(外在因素)

祸不单行就是这样吗?

我现在是超级没钱的。
上个星期以为只需挨过那几天…谁知道还要挨更久
爸爸还没有领工资

还好现在接近端午节
还有奶奶的粽子当饭吃
所以还可以不像上个星期一样挨饿…

我希望SUBWAY能请我或者在SSC的随便一个店打工也行
我只想填补家用,只想不再花妈咪的钱
只想买我画画的笔和ASSESSEMENT BOOK

想在SSC的原因是因为很靠近家
又有免费的车到…可以省一笔车费
时间上只要是PART-TIME应该没问题反正靠近啊
感觉整个人很累…但是还是要加油!!!

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Sunday, May 10, 2009, 4:51:00 PM
好狼狈的我……

我是个很理智,很理性的人
心里总会有个小小的算盘
希望这样子能让自己不受到任何的伤害……

这几天发生了些事,而且发生的太突然了
导致我小小的算盘爆了
让我没办法造招架,没办法反应过来……
事后也开始有了一些自己没办法解释的行为
连自己所剩的理智都像被锁了起来……

这种不理智是我前所未有的……
第一次的不理智弄得我感觉很狼狈很狼狈……
一直到现在还觉得很痛苦刚开始时茶不思饭不想的一直睡觉让自己不要再想
因为一开始想就会哭,心会很痛很痛……
有如在触碰刚受伤的伤口……
自从星期5,我已不再哭了虽说伤口仍然没复原但也已经慢慢的接收那种痛楚了……

算盘已经修的差不多了
刘敏说的对已经是过去了,再说什么也没办法改变什么。
在此我想谢谢所有在我那么痛苦时陪伴,开道着我的朋友们
没有你们理智的我不会回来

名单:
1)刘敏 2)梓榕
3)佳忆 4)嘉荣
5)伟汉 6)Sze Yong
7)Angelina

从我打完这篇日志时理智的我会压印这不理智的我
对我来说痛苦是自己的
而痛苦的时候我会自己承担再也不会在你们面前那样了…
我很Okay的~相信我…

还有在最后要祝我的好朋友与好大姐,海:要幸福哦!!!天天快乐!!!一切顺利!!!
(P.S: 今天和家人去光明山(庙)拜拜有祝你一切顺利啦,不会再不顺利了)

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4:45:00 PM
JUST FOR THE SAKE OF POSTING

I want to write a post in Mandrin but I had to write an English one first...

So I named the post as JUST FOR THE SAKE OF POSTING.

I do not want to be like Angelina who posted the whole page filled with "WEIYAO :D"

Nothing much to write...

Damn sian now but everything will be fine soon :D

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Saturday, May 9, 2009, 3:45:00 AM
疯了!!!!!!

原本已经快打好黄海回过前的经过…

可是这两天挺郁闷的…

大家都说不同的东西

我不知道要相信谁……

刘敏说黄海真的不会来了

爱``sorry(QQ名字,黄海的朋友)说黄海会考虑曲深圳的外贸公司上班

黄海说他也许回来,在INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL考 'O'水准

所以到底是怎么样?!

不知道为什么就很想知道

想得很累了……

搞到现在身体不是很好…

疯了!!!!!!!!!

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Tuesday, May 5, 2009, 2:06:00 PM
POTATO TREATMENT

Hmm. I can only say potato did not seem to did any good to my skin...

In fact my ezcema is worst now...

red, tight skin and itch...still feel like ants biting me...

I wonder if I should continue or should I just give up?

Gosh...I am in a dilemma now...

***
my tagboard is so quiet....
Sometimes I wonder, does anyone come to my blog?

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1:59:00 AM
马铃薯治湿疹?!

麟翔前天晚上在网上找到能用马铃薯(土豆)治湿疹

说100%有效

今天就去尝试了…

要连续用7天,每天换三次

所以我决定把每一天的情况写在部落格上…


第一天 晚上,凌晨12点
今天第一天尝试马铃薯治疗湿疹

曾经听过人家12点削苹果

我呢?削土豆皮?! 

呵呵…还挺期待的 

因为患了湿疹已经有1年多了

一直希望能好 可是中医,西医都没帮助

其实配方上是说要把生土豆弄成泥 可是弄不了所以把它切片了

花了1个半小时才弄好

放上去刺刺,痒痒的…

用纱布缠起来明天再看效果

但是现在感觉很像是被很多蚂蚁咬

但是要忍耐啊!佩珊你可以的!

都忍受湿疹一年了

这算什么?坚持!!!

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Monday, May 4, 2009, 11:24:00 PM
SO MANY THINGS TO WRITE!

Oh gosh...i did not post for a few days already...

I had so many things to write but do not know which to write first again...

I want to write about

KUALA LUMPUR AND GENTING TRIP

JIE JIE TELLING DAD ABOUT REGISTER FOR MARRIAGE WITH HAN SHENG

LIN XIANG'S BAD MOOD TODAY

MY EZCEMA

Gosh... What should I do?

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Sunday, April 26, 2009, 4:57:00 AM
伟汉的F&N COURSEWORK

Dear Dear很抱歉……
在这个已经不能用晚来形容的时间我还没睡觉。

我真的睡不着啊!这几天生病感觉整个星期都是睡过来的……
尤其是今天…算上昨晚和今天睡午觉的时间加起来最少也有12小时啊!

今天睡了一天后在傍晚六点钟从家出发去刘敏家
伟汉约了我过去教他做F&N Coursework
虽说病似乎好了可是我骑脚踏车还是觉得很辛苦所以起得速度不快

骑车时心比平时跳得更快更用力…还挺难受的
进去他们家后我开始找我的手机了可是怎么找都找不到
还下楼看我是否漏在车上了
但最后在文件架里找到…… (=.=)

重点来了
伟汉打开了他的coursework给我看
疯了!错误百出!
不是漏了标题,漏了字不然就是文不对题
次序也乱七八糟改到我哭笑不得啊!

最后改到9点后就不改了!回家再改
去吃晚餐…今天吃了粥 还好吃得完 
这几天一直没胃口

吃完后又回到刘敏他们家不知怎么的说到了童年…
童年…想想感觉当时真不错…但回不去了
可怜的是伟汉…没什么童年啊
除了乱解剖金鱼以外应该没什么了吧…

当时伟汉在用MSN和一个老朋友聊天
我看了他们的话题就……无语了
伟汉超搞笑啊 把已经振作起来的人得伤心事都给挖出来了
估计他的朋友会很难受吧…
我看她约回复约无语
最后只能回伟汉很多………………………………………………

伟汉的人还挺好笑的
人是还好只是……有点极端
非常反派可以把正常人(Tng Kuang)教到不正常啊
感觉Tng Kuang已经被教到如果身在美国就会带枪上学来扫射大家一样(@.@)
可是伟汉!你是我的好乾弟啦~

回家的时候已经12点了
骑脚踏车回家
谁说猫的第六感很强?!我差点就撞到一只
骑车吓到猫咪了,然后猫咪要往我正要去跑过
还好我不是很灵的刹车这次能把车及时减速不然就死定了!
猫咪估计也被吓坏了…

(主意:日志里的今天是星期六4月26日)

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Tuesday, April 21, 2009, 10:56:00 AM
生病了………

这几天生病了,应该是最近休息不够吧

星期天在麟翔家开始发烧38.2°

还好吃了药后就不烧了

可是一直头闷闷的

星期一还是一样闷闷的而且还是没有胃口…

可能因为白天吃了糯米饭…不好消化吧

晚上胃不舒服……

睡不着……头闷是应该睡觉的可是胃不舒服根本睡不了……

折腾了我超久……

难受啊………………

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Sunday, April 12, 2009, 12:52:00 AM
FAMILY TRIP TO KUALA LUMPUR -cum- GENTING (SUMMARY)

I am BACK to SINGAPORE~

I had great fun in GENTING~

But did not have much time to spend on shopping in KUALA LUMPUR

Spent long hours on the bus but all worth while :D


Anyways, this is just a summary

Thus, I shall keep it short and simple

I'll be writing abt the trip in detail after i had some rest

because I am really tired

And also after I get most of the picture from my family members~

Guess it'll take a few days but it is worth the wait~

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Tuesday, March 31, 2009, 12:36:00 AM
Huiru being PIGGY BACKED

Huiru, Xinrong and I went to NORTHPOINT for dinner tonight because mum and dad went to GOLDEN MILE at Bridge Road to pay for our upcoming MALAYSIA TRIP.

We ate at the new Japanese-themed food court and guess what..
Xinrong only ate two sets of 8 sushi (the kind with only crabstick in it)
but she seemed full after all...

We chatted alot and as we finished, we went to the library upstairs to borrow some books but as we were heading down Huiru cannot stand the pain anymore. She had been complaining about the pain in her leg but she claimed that she could bear with it. Eventually, she can't. She was quite funny, laughing in the painful face but I know she is going to cry soon (The last time I went out with her, she gave the same face when she is hungry and started crying.) So I have decided to piggy back her. She is not very very heavy(I am from evacuation team leh...30kg no kick man... but she was literally slinding off everytime + i well that my health is not so good recently so has quite a tough time) She is a bad piggy backer almost strangled me no death...I tried my best not to fling her away but i needed to go to POPULAR BOOKSTORE so I came up with a decision, to leave them at the chairs in the interchange. So I dashed to the closest chair to where Bus812 and dash off to buy my stuffs.(POPULAR is closing soon)

On my way, I saw Wei Han in red. haha said "hi" and continue to go POPULAR. Just in time to buy what i need~ Haha...what a day~

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Monday, March 30, 2009, 11:45:00 PM
為了濕看疹中醫…

昨天我去看了中醫…
幾次帶私涵和偉漢去看跌打
都沒自己嘗試… 以為是沒什么……

前天終于體會到了………………………………

濕疹嚴重化了
忍無可忍了
所以決定去看中醫
剛開始以為只是拔罐啊什么的
哪里知道是要放血
我不怕放血啦…

可是……這次不行了

那個討厭的醫生(女的)
沒有溝通多少就在我身上打洞
剛開始還好在膝蓋附近打了幾個洞
還以久等血放了就沒事了

怎么知道………………………………

痛苦的來了!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
醫生(女的)開始在我腳板打洞…
前幾個我忍住了
我以為只打5-6個洞怎么知道她一直打
開始還忍住了 告訴自己不能哭
可是腳板打洞很痛耶!!!


想象腳心被打洞的感覺…………………………


而且在我沒有心里準備的時候打…
最后忍不住了就哭了起來

超級痛的…
我寧愿她用刀子捅我
也不愿意讓醫生(女的)在我腳板一直捅
我哭的把隔壁的醫生(男的)都哭過來的
醫生(男)對醫生(女)說:“她怕疼就讓她回家泡腳啊,不一定要放血啊”
聽到這句……(我郁悶了,WTF…可以不打洞怎么不說!)
突然有想殺人的感覺

最后還要負他們$78(加上藥得錢)

哭得超慘…整個診所都聽到(診所不大,店鋪得大小而已)…
還一直哭到家555
現在想到還想哭……

但是我要忍耐!要快快好起來!
(要強調女醫生因為平時沒看到她,感覺她有點怪怪的)
我不敢周末去了!以后我要周日去,看那個比較好的!

可是洞洞看起來好像瘀青了,有點腫,有點癢…不知道是為什么




膝蓋上方的洞洞

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Saturday, March 21, 2009, 12:42:00 AM
繁體字

我比較喜歡繁體字…

雖說比簡體字難寫多了可是現在有電腦可以打字所以還好…

喜歡繁體字的原因是因為看起來比較好看

還有字看起來比較有意義~

只會些繁體字的爸爸星期天時問我:“佩珊,問你你知道為什么現在的人越來越沒有愛心嗎?”

我就說:“不知道” (我爸爸常常會突然想到常人想不到的東西)

爸爸說:“都因為簡體字!你知道為什么嗎?因為現在用的簡體字的‘爱’已经和繁體字的‘愛’不同了。現在的爱只有友沒有心了…所以現在的人越來越沒有愛心”

我當時:-.-|||

爸爸:“繁體字比較有意思,簡體字都把意思弄掉了”(繼續看報紙)

其實想想,爸爸說得也對所以支持繁體!~可是不會寫啦……真的太難了

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Wednesday, March 11, 2009, 1:57:00 AM
FEELING BUSY……

I feel that i have been pretty busy recently even though i have spent less time with Lin Xiang, my deardear.

I've decided to stop playing the game that i was playing which is quite time consuming...

BUT STILL...

Today,
I did my fashion design homework but yet to complete.

I went to meet Sze Yong for advise about my 'O' levels because I had some problems. I cannot choose combine science because I cannot take the pratical. They (MOE) will use my SPA for my science results... Which is HORRIBLE!!! so Sze Yong said that I should probably meet my school tescher to talk about it.
I would probably go tomorrow. I need it fast. I think it'll be good if i can speak to Mrs Yee or something.

Later, SY & me went to eat and go popular to buy Xin Rong correction tape refill. I am suspecting that probably Xin Rong is dyslexic like me...Looking at the amount of correction tape she us, her spelling, her English work...HIGH POSSIBILITIES! Anyways, I'll be making a trip to her school to tell her school so that they can write her a letter to check in KK HOSPITAL.

Then, I went to Ang Mo Kio to buy my pencil case when Wei Han called to ask me where to see a good chinese doctor for sprain cos he sprained his ankle. Hmph..so I volunteer to bring him there. His condition was quite bad with high possibilities of getting a fracture at the back of his sole..



GET WELL SOON WEI HAN!!!
AND
PLEASE FOLLOW WHAT THE DOCTOR TELLS YOU !!!

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Wednesday, March 4, 2009, 10:48:00 PM
END OF THE RAINBOW~

Today...
I was to help coach Jia Yi with her school work at the school library but the rain was extemely heavy. I used a bigger umbrella today as it is too big for my little sentosa umbrella to protect me from it.

At the bus-stop, I missed a bus 812. I was running late!
BUT luckily I've missed it. Or else I would have to missed a chance of my life...
To see the end of the rainbow so close...
No pot of gold behind the rainbow though...haha
It only lasted for less than 5 minutes...


Look carfully to see the rainbow o(^-^)o

At the bus-stop, other than me, there was a uncle but he didn't seem to have seen the rainbow cos he was talking on the phone looking at another direction

After the rainbow was gone, there was another rainbow but much bigger in the sky...pretty! but i didn't manage to take a picture of that.. No idea why..Probably because it is too far away...

It was a long wait for the next 812..Probably 20 mins or so...
Jia Yi didn't seem to mind so I'm Pretty oki~

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Wednesday, February 25, 2009, 5:20:00 PM
ABANDON-ED MY BLOG?!

Actually I felt it myself.
I have been viewing my own blog to listen to the songs I like and I have not been posting lastly because...I DO NOT KNOW WHERE TO START AGAIN! ARGH...

So many things to write but I dunno which to start first..So I just left my blog like this for days. Today! I am finally posting again...

hmm...maybe I should start with today...
I ate Atarax(medicine for itch to reduce eczema)last night, 2.00 am and fell asleep 30mins later...

At 6:44am
I was woken up by my phone's snooze (Ops...forgot to Morning Call Lin Xiang at 6.30) so I called him right away after that and he have already prepared, ready to leave home...So I fell back to sleep

12:19pm
Woken up by mum's phone call (Ops...forgot to accompany mum to National Skin Center for her appointment as promised to check for her allegy) She claims that she have tried waking me up but I do not remember. Anyways, she went there herself so I guess everything is fine.

Approximate 1:30
Mum's back, woke me up and she bought Donuts from Donut Empire but I wanted Cheese Lover from Chewy Junior. I am practically fine with Donuts that are sweet but she bought CHEESE FLAVOURED DONUTS?! I don't like the taste of it... To me, Donuts are suppose to be sweet! Anyways I ate it and went back to sleep as my stomach felt weird after eating it.

Kept sleeping and waking
I woke up a couple of times to make adjustments to the game i am playing. Adjustments only takes about 5 min, then sleep again.

All the way till 5 plus...but I'll be sleeping again after this post i guess...still drowsy...hmm...and i think this will carry on for days because I'll be eating the medicine to nite again. Hope my eczema can get better :)


Atarax - the pill is extremely tiny and only half can make me sleep for so long?! (oh btw..the 1cent is for reference on the size)

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Wednesday, February 18, 2009, 11:09:00 PM
THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!!

Today is quite a dangerous day I guess.
WEI QI, ANGELINA,LINXIANG and ME started off at bugis to shop for sis's prezzie.

We went to FOX(clothes store). LIN XIANG and I talked about his dancing while queueing up at the counter. Then as I was talking about flexibility, I bent slightly backwards and soon I heard a loud "OUCH" from behind me followed by a sharp pain on the top of my head.. Soon, I realised that I accidentally hit on somebody else's head HARD without knowing that she was behind me.

It was an accident. I can say we were both at the wrong although I am the one who hit her. She was like damn angry. Lin Xiang as the witness said that he could feel the pain when we knocked as the knock was like extremely loud.

But why do I think it was both our fault?
MY FAULTS:
(1) I should not show the body geature of flexibility
(2) Maybe I should wait till there is no one at the counter to prevent space congestion.

NOT MY FAULT BECAUSE:
(1) I do not have eyes behind my back
(2) She can see that there is a queue and is congested, so why can't she use another way?

Anyways she kind of stared and walk away toward BHG...Hmph..oki, maybe it was just kind of bad luck today or something. The hit was REALLY painful! I can still feel it in my head.

Then later in the day, I almost killed ANGELINA when I was keeping my wallet at the ORCHARD MRT station. I almost elbowed her on her chest bone! With the swinging force I was quite sure if she didn't move away, I would break her rib cage. She damn cool loh. Like MATRIX, she saw my elbow coming and moved slightly away just to miss it we were like almost touching when my action was finished. Hmph...I guess I have been pretty dangerous, thats why she is always on her feet to defend herself from accidents like this.haha. And sis we bought your prezzies already!!! So excited to show you what we have bought :)

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